Sometimes we feel like we are sabotaging our success and trapped by some cruel fate. We cannot win, get things to turn out as planned or make progress in the direction we're headed. In the Middle Ages, this condition was diagnosed as being "possessed by demons". We can look at this with a less hysterical approach and see the template in use.
When we're not "possessed by demons", we're possessed by something else that gets a different result for us without thinking. Seeing these other templates will help perceive the structure of self-sabotage .
Success is a target: We may devote ourselves to a template that gives us lots to do, many ways to make progress, and a sense of accomplishment from how busy we have been. Success at getting ahead by our own effort, endurance and initiative is a given. When success appears to be fading or becoming elusive, this template dictates more action, accomplishments and dedication. We stay on target to maintain the pattern of deliberate success. We avoid messing it up with fears, doubts, or hesitation.
Success is a mystery: We may be dedicate ourselves to making discoveries. We may realize we don't understand the people we work with, the customers that pay us, and the difference we make in other lives. Our success as a target may be very misguided, doing more harm than good, and sending the wrong message. We delve into other points of view, alternative ways to value our contributions, and phases in the development of abilities. When our success wanes, we explore more and learn to approach the situation with greater insight, consideration and respect. We will see our previous success as: lacking in self respect, trading gratuitous compliments to overcome our insecurities and dancing on shaky ground. We remain curious about the mystery to maintain our pattern of exploratory success. We avoid messing it up with our arrogance, over confidence and determination to already be right.
Success is a gift: We may devote ourselves to finding what we're called to do with our talents and natural inclinations. We may let go of every notion that the world approves of in order to realize the unique thing to do found within us. The closer we get to it, the more perfect it looks. It appears that everything that happened to us prepared us to make a gift of ourselves in this way. We see how much we grown from setbacks, matured from pain, wised up from empty successes and thankfully turned within when the world appeared insane to us. We remain honored to be given this to do, amazed how how our entire lifetime could be so intelligently designed, and relieved that the success is a given on every conceivable level.
When we are sabotaging our success or caught in a pattern of apparent failure, all three other success templates are taking effect:
- We are being the target of someone who lacks self respect and successfully abuses their targets. We take what they dish out, but not take back on themselves. We get first hand experiences of how over-confidence hurts others and how free will cannot handle others having free will too. We realize we have internalized this abuse into templates that attract more of the same experiences. We are captivated by another's success that holds us in contempt, invalidates our self respect and frames us as inadequate.
- We are engaged in a mystery of how to get out of this condition when nothing we try works. We discover it's inescapable by any form of ambition, determination or action. We lose faith in fixing it ourselves. We seek outside or inside guidance to get a perspective we cannot come up with on our own. We see the templates that succeed every time. We get the picture of how we're doing this to ourselves by buying into the self concept devoid of self respect.
- We are receiving a gift from all this. We are getting a life experience that is part of the design of our destiny. It's not only "meant to happen", but of incalculable benefit once we get turned around to make a gift of ourselves.