Most college professors and corporate trainers I've met were ashamed of how they conduct their classes. They were either too strict or too lenient, but never effective at supporting self-directed, reflective learning. Learners who were aware of how they were being taught would catch the instructors in the act of ineffective conduct. The instructors would be devastated and defeated. They relied upon fragile structures that only supported acts of desperation. They acted powerless to change, afraid of feedback and intimidated by realistic assessments of their conduct. They were shattered by feedback on their desperate pursuits.
Most front line supervisors I met during consulting gigs were arrogant about how they managed others. They were too distant or were micromanaging their subordinates, but never effective at supporting initiative and teamwork. Employees would catch those supervisors in the act of mismanaging them. The supervisors would be hostile, intolerant and spiteful toward their subordinates. They relied on fortressed structures that supported acts of determination. They acted overconfident in order to control others, afraid of dependency and intimidated by contradictions. They were determined to maintain their closed minds.Most entrepreneurs I've mentored are concerned with how they act with their customers. They are either overly responsive to others or overly critical of themselves, but never effective at creating mutually beneficial deals. Customers catch the entrepreneurs in the act of customer service. The entrepreneurs are taught a lesson, shown a better way and encouraged to strike a better balance. They rely on open structures that support acts of integration. They act genuinely concerned, afraid of trashing relationships and intimidated by abuses of power. They are integrating insights about their own conduct and their effects on others.
Most creatives I've collaborated with at length are creating how we act together. We are balancing how we respond to each other and meet our own needs too. We catch each other in the act of nurturing our collaboration. We respond in kind, practice appreciative inquiry and recognize the issues that have been resolved. We rely on fluid structures that support acts of inspiration. We act continually creative and afraid of nothing that could happen between us. We are flowing with what comes to mind and circumstances in the collaboration.