Pulling for the pushers
Can pushers of content, tools, products and changes be stopped by pulling for them?
Pulling does not stop people, it creates space for them to rethink their options. When people feel like someone is pulling for them, they lower their defenses and welcome the opportunity for collaboration. By not getting pushed, they sense they don't need to guard against what they are getting sold or told to do. They experience the presence of mind where their right brains kick in?
Do hard-core pushers feel these effects from getting pulled for?
Not in my experience. People that believe in the necessity of pushing people perceive pulling as a lack of effort, determination or courage. They cannot respect pulling or value the differences it makes. In their minds, every situation calls for pushing other people into submission, compliance or self-contempt. The practice of empathy for pushers relates to their one-track mind, one right answer and one way to win.
Does that mean the way to pull for pushers is to help them be more pushy?
Yes indeed. Pushers set up arguments about the necessity and legitimacy of pushing where pulling for people is wrong, bad or stupid. To come back with no argument, no pushing back, no resistance to their pushing -- does effectively pull for them. The silence about not-pushing is deafening. The cooperation with their pushing is mind boggling. The permission to persist with pushing is not the least bit pushy. The contrary example is successfully provided without calling attention to it. The message is sent subliminally.
What if the pushers don't get it?
They won't get it. Pulling is off their radar. They cannot make sense of it as something to do to make necessary things happen. They cannot argue against it because it comes from out of nowhere in their minds. It gets to them without thinking it through, understanding how it occurred or explaining it rationally.