When we find home base in our minds, we experience a peace of mind that defies explanation. We can be in the midst of massive turmoil and feel serene within. This peace of mind is connected to who we really are, not our circumstances or past history.
With this peace of mind comes an added benefit: we can feel our feelings. The emotional turmoil that drowns them out recedes from our experience. We need access to our feelings to make good decisions. Our feelings guide us away from wasted efforts, regrettable engagements and baited traps. Our feelings guide us toward our calling right now. They show us what is the right thing to see, say and do. They inspire us with intrinsic motivation to get the little bit of what needs doing done right now.
When we've been traumatized by some unwanted experience in our lives, there are seven things we can do to change our state of mind. All seven of these have worked for me for many years:
- We can realize that our minds are clinging to what happened and choose to let go of it. We can tell ourselves it's not happening here and now or it didn't happened the way we think it did from our limited perspective.
- We can stop being right about the objective facts of the incident and switch to the subjective dimensions of the experience. We can explore the personal meaning for us or reframe the "half empty" thing as ""half full" instead.
- We can disrupt our replaying the past in our minds and become absorbed in the present moment. We can listen with all ears and bask in the immediate sights, smells and textures.
- We can interrupt our labeling ourselves a failure and see the processes we're pursuing. We can see ways to do more growing, changing and learning from the experience.
- We can dispel our fears of being cursed and imagine freedom from that dreadful fate. We can envision a desired future and create a new way to be here now.
- We can silence our one-sided story and explore other viewpoints. We can entertain dialogues with other characters which reveal other interests and interpretations which contributed to the incident.
- We can rise above our agitated emotions and embrace a calm acceptance of all that's transpired. We can feel our feelings of being loved unconditionally, forgiven totally and free of all troublesome illusions.
Once we find home base in our minds, we naturally make these seven changes in our mind all the time. There's seems to be no valid reason to get upset. There are too many benefits to feeling our feelings to mess with our serenity.